So what exactly is a phobia?
Typically a phobia is defined as a compelling fear or dread of a particular object or situation.
And how are they created?
The person with the phobia experiences a traumatic or Significant Smotional Event (S.E.E) during a situation or in close proximity to an object that becomes symbolic of the event. From a behavioral psychology perspective the S.E.E and the phobia trigger are 'anchored' so that every time the phobia trigger is fired it produces the emotion associated with the original event.
This is why many phobias defy logic or reason; otherwise we could rationalize away the phobia. Because the association between the emotional event and the object or situation is created unconsciously they need to be disconnected at an unconscious level.
Break the association
Three are a number of proven methods to break the association at the unconscious level. The key thing to understand is that your unconscious mind created this connection 'or phobia' for your protection, to remove the phobia your unconscious mind needs to know you are safe.
So ask yourself "Is it ok to continue to be totally safe and remove the negative emotions associated with the phobia?" Typically the answer is "YES" and you can continue onto one of the techniques below.
If the answer is "NO" or "I think so" or you are not sure then remind your unconscious mind that holding on to the negative emotion is harmful and potentially damaging to the body. Then ask yourself the first question again. Again the common answer is "YES" and you can continue.
If the answer is still "NO" ask your unconscious mind "Would it be ok to experience the emotion surrounding the phobia reducing, whilst remaining totally safe?" If you get a "YES" then proceed.
If you feel answer is still "NO" you need to understand the purpose of holding on to the negative emotion, which needs may require one-on-one help from a qualified professional. See the resource list for details. You can still use the techniques to break the association however you may need repeated usage to achieve the desired effect.
Calibrate the changes.
Start by thinking of the object or situation that caused the phobia in the past and scoring it on a scale of one (low, no emotion) to ten (high emotion, physical symptoms of stress) for how much fear it created. This will provide you a benchmark so that you know how much it has changed having used one or more of the techniques below.
After using the techniques notice what you feel differently when you think about the object or situation and rescore how you feel on a scale of one to ten. If necessary repeat or interchange these techniques to further reduce your score to a point where the phobia is no longer an issue.
For objects: Change the pattern
These techniques are specifically designed to break the association at a symbolic or unconscious level. They require your active participation to be most effective. The more you play the faster it goes away! Choose the technique that will be most effective for you, trust your instincts and either:
Put your favorite piece of music on the stereo (loud) and whilst singing along think of that old phobia that used to make you feel the way that it did and notice how it seems less important now.
Put your favorite movie on the T.V. and whilst pretending to be one of the characters attempt to remember that old phobia and let it become an increasingly dim and distant feeling and see how you have changed.
Have a bath, with lots of bubble bath, run the suds through you fingers and try to recall those past emotions and notice how easily the way old emotions just wash away.
For situations: Visualize a different behavior
This technique is specifically designed to remove the emotional attachment of the phobia and replace it with a new one. This process is a very fast process and can be repeated until the old emotion is gone or reduced to an insignificant level.
Find a quiet place to relax. Visualize a small black and white T.V. screen that is above your eye level. Play the movie of the old phobia on the screen, half way through imagine it dissolving and being replaced by a new colourful movie of what you want instead.
